The same concern can be expressed in ways that connect or create distance. This game helps you recognize the difference.
How It Works
You'll see a situation and two ways to respond
Pick the message that feels more supportive
Learn why certain phrases land differently
Round 1 of 8
The Situation
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Which response feels more supportive?
💡 Why This Matters
Great Listening!
You can recognize supportive language
0/8
Supportive messages identified
🌟 Key Insight
The difference often isn't what you're asking about — it's how you ask. Questions that focus on the person (not the behavior) tend to feel more supportive.
The shift: From "What did you do?" to "How are you doing?"
🚫 Creates Distance
"Should you be eating that?"
"What did you eat?"
"That's a lot of carbs"
"Are you sure about that?"
Builds Connection
"How are you feeling?"
"Need anything?"
"What sounds good?"
"I'm here if you need me"
📝 Language Guide
Phrases to retire and phrases to try
🚫 Things NOT to Say About Food
"Should you be eating that?" — Implies judgment
"That's a lot of carbs" — They already know
"I thought you couldn't have..." — Creates shame
"Are you sure that's okay?" — Questions competence
"You're going to regret that" — Future-shaming
"Just checking — did you...?" — Monitoring disguised as care
Things to Say Instead
"How are you feeling?" — Focuses on the person
"Need anything from the kitchen?" — Offers help without judgment
"What sounds good tonight?" — Collaborative
"Want company while you eat?" — Presence over policing